Wait
And grief still feels ... like suspense. Or like waiting; just hanging about waiting for something to happen. It gives life a permanently provisional feeling. --C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed Even five months out, my subconscious does not catch up. In my practical life, I know what I must do. I am in a pretty consistent problem-solving mode. And I am not bad at it. There are times when I am overwhelmed, but I have worked out a system with the kids on how to signify that to them, and what to do about it (another example of, well, problem-solving). I also have many helping me, many who care for me. In the midst of the active days, I sometimes catch myself and realize that what inspires me in this problem-solving mode is the awareness that has got me through similar seasons in life: the awareness of finitude. Intense times are temporary. There are sabbath rests at the end. So far so good. But I have also realized that I still expect this season to end with Heidi coming back and telling...